I’ve Got The Life Coach In Me

Tags: amateur comedians, fear, persistence, Saskatoon, struggles, The Stand-Up Diaries, Trevor Dean comedian

A few times when I did open mics the other comics made reference to my set.  Not necessarily because it was awesomely funny and not necessarily because it sucked either.  No, they made reference to me for a couple of things.

• the energy of my set
• my clothes

My coach made mention once that the performer should always dress better than the audience.  That makes sense.  If you dress better, it makes you have a bit more confidence and feel a bit more relaxed on stage, and most of the time that shows.

The energy usually means that I put some emotion into my performance.  It seems like at times I am the only one who is really passionate about their point of view in a particular joke.  You look at the guys on t.v, especially Just For Laughs.  A lot of the guys on there have personality.  You can tell how they feel about the joke they tell.  If the joke makes them agitated, they show it.  If the joke makes them embarrassed, they show it.  If they joke makes them excitable, they show it.  There are some nights where that emotion lacks.  I feel if the audience can’t feel that emotion, a lot of times they can’t make that connection to who you are, thus not getting the laughs that you should on stage.

So here comes along someone like me, who has failed probably 75% of the time on stage, at least.  There is one thing I have learned from my comedy coach and from really studying comedy.  The other comics won’t talk about it, but failure is necessary.  Failure is your friend.

Failure in comedy can make you gun shy and lazy, not wanting to sit down and do the hard work necessary to write better material.  You can write a new joke every month on the same subject and through attrition, have the theme of the joke become more crisp and identifiable to the audience.  That doesn’t mean you have to rewrite the same joke each time.  It means that you get better at telling the story about that subject, whether it be about relationships, cooking, children, etc.

Of the amateur comedians in the city I write the most.  I always write a few pages a month and do that new material.  When you watch one of my sets you never know what I am going to say, because I always do new material.  I’m not afraid to try something different.

You need to have fun with the process.  That is the most important thing.  You must believe by faith that at some point you will hit the gold mine, the jackpot of material where everything you touch turns to gold.

It also helps to have somebody believe in you, to be in your corner to give you that inspiration to move on and keep going forward despite the obstacles in your way.  I have a life coach, my comedy coach and a few close friends who help to keep me motivated through the down times.  It is because of this motivation that I do not have a fear of failing.  There might be a bit of fear before the show starts, but I create material and keep working on the craft because I believe I will succeed one day, not being paralyzed by fear to prevent me from moving forward.

This is why I am moving my comedy career in a completely new direction this fall.  Seems like some of us are scared.  Scared to step out and try something different to separate ourselves from the rest of the pack.  Why, because of the ridicule we may get if it doesn’t work?  What if the opposite of that happened, and instead of getting trashed for it, that the idea actually is a hit and does really well?  You would get praise and other comics wanting to have you to be part of their gigs, or better yet getting your own corporate gigs.

The comedy scene will not have seen anything like what I have planned for the fall.  It’s different and a big risk to be that different from everybody else.  But when I hit that fork in the road it’s really easy to want to pack it in, especially when you get shit on most of the time over the five years you’ve been doing comedy.  But I have always kept those disbelievers in the back of my mind.  They help me move forward to be better than what I presently am.

The other thing is that this new direction I am going in will not be done at the regular open mic nights.  I will be selective with where I perform this “new angle” that I am presently working on.  It will be performed for comedy audiences at comedy clubs and at venues where there are enough people to make it viable to perform, or for corporate gigs.  I see myself being able to carve out a niche in the corporate comedy market here in the province.  What I have planned is that different, that bold, that risky.

If it works, I take corporate gigs from other comics because I will be the first one some companies will think of when wanting to hire a comedian.

This year has been a bad year for a lot of people personally.  For myself, 2016 hasn’t been a very good one.  But the difference between me and others who have seen 2016 suck is that I refuse to stay stuck where I am.  It’s like TD Jakes said.  He said that you should not make the mistake to run from fear, pain and sorrow.  When you do that, sure you might be thinking about what bad things will happen next, what mistakes your spouse might make next, how they might fuck things up worse too.  But that type of a mindset limits you from seeing what your spouse, what the important people in your life are doing instead.  In that moment of in between, as you try to come to grips with the shit life throws at you, it’s in those moments where you will miss out on the most important moments of your life, moments of change, moments of growth, moments of rising up from whatever pit life sucked you into and walking in victory.

Now, that doesn’t mean you got everything figured out, you certainly won’t have all the answers just yet.  But what it does is shift your mindset to allow you to look at things from a more positive and optimistic point of view.  When you do that, you are less likely to use hurtful language towards others who try to help you.  You become more appreciative or and recognize more the efforts of those around you.  You become in tune to the little things others do that make a big difference in your day.

With me in my comedy, there is only so long I could stay in that dark and lonely pit that I got dragged into and left to die in.  There is only so long I could stay bitter, negative and not believe things would get better.  Getting out of that pit didn’t mean I knew how to succeed right away.  What it did mean however, is that I wasn’t going to hurt others who were there to help me.  It was my time to identify those people who could help me, and lift them up so they in turn could lift me up to greater heights.  Then when you walk in that confidence, guess what happens?  You now have a mindset that is more positive and able to figure out the answers to the question about how to be more successful.

There are only four people, no….make that five.  There are five people that I trust who can help me get out of that pit.  They may not have the answers for me when I need them, but they empower me to find those answers on my own.

Life is too short to stay in that pit and use it as an excuse to treat others like crap and seemingly take them for granted.  Would you want that done to you?  I can tell you with absolute certainty that no matter who you are at this very moment, there is at least one person in your life right now who knows you better than most.  If this person isn’t aware it’s them, seek them out and tell them.  But we all have that one person who knows us better than we know ourselves at times, the person who we can look into their eyes and see the truth that those eyes lie to everyone else with.

Do not get sucked into that pit.  If you are there, find someone to help you out of it.  If you don’t know where to start, then think back to somebody who did something nice for you, to help you out or “just because.”  Those are the people to seek out first because they have no hidden agenda.  If you cannot find anyone like that around you (though I cannot see how you can’t find at least one person), then follow me.  I will take the lead and show you how to step up and step out.  To be bold, confident and fearless in pursuit of what you want to accomplish.

I hate being treated worse than everyone else while trying to be like everyone else.  I have to carve out my own niche and leave the lazy ones unwilling to work hard and change in the dust.  Other comics will want do be a part of my gigs that I book.  People will respect me more and treat me better.  People who take me for granted and throw me under the bus currently will treat me better.

I am too significant to God, too unique and too valuable to be ignored and cast aside by others.  It’s time to shake up the Saskatoon comedy scene this fall.  When I debut my new angle to Saskatoon’s comedy scene, it will be to a full house, an appreciative comedy audience.  My friends will actually come out for the first time in well over a year to watch what I have in store.  Best part is, they will come up to me after the show and actually compliment me on a good job that I did.  I may talk a big game, but I have the balls to make it happen.

Watch me