All Good Things…… Must Come To A Crash Landing

Tags: Saskatoon, Saskatoon comedians, Saskatoon comedy, standup diaries, The Stand-Up Diaries, the standup diaries, trevor dean, Trevor Dean comedian, trevor dean saskatoon

This blog is closing in on ten years with a global reach of 110+ countries amassing well over 40,000 views, as we close in on almost 400 blog posts.

Over the years I have always tried to not be like everyone else, and for the most part I have stayed true to myself in that regard.  My parents always said that I should be like other kids whose parents they know, and are doing well.  Sure mom and dad, I will try to be like other successful kids you know, become somebody I’m not, unhappy but make you guys happy.  I don’t think so.

The most important lesson I learned from my last relationship was the value of authenticity, and how I needed to develop that in my daily life in dealing with others, and how others deal with me.

I’m pleased to say that I can generally tell when somebody isn’t being authentic.  Sometimes you just get a sense from a person that it isn’t if they will screw you over, but when.

I’m not here to get on another dating diatribe again.  I only referenced the relationship to put the focus on authenticity, at least for this post.  I have been working with my life coach over the last few years to really develop that.  I believe that authenticity will only come when you are at peace with who you are, I mean really at peace.  Some people you meet and get the sense they are blissfully ignorant to anything around them that doesn’t go their way, as if to ignore the bad.  You don’t ignore the bad, you learn to navigate through it.

Authenticity will humble you, as it has me.  After all I have been through in my life, there isn’t anything that a person can say, or do, that I haven’t already dealt with.  If it’s a new challenge, I am already battle tested with all types of adversity to be able to confidently handle anything that comes my way, in part because of the great support system I have around me from my friends and church.

Maybe it’s because I am turning 50 in a couple of years, maybe it’s because I’ve lead a lifetime of failures that would equal several lifetimes lived.  The lessons I have learned have allowed me to not take things for granted.  I also believe that some people have it easy (ie: successful career for 10+ years like my dad and others I know), because they aren’t destined to do something great.  If you think about it, in the Bible, all the people who did anything great had to become battle tested first.  They had to overcome adversity and develop their character and leadership skills when it seemed like nothing was happening, when it appeared that the wrong things happened when they did the right thing.

I have spent enough time in comedy, failed enough and been around the block in life enough to know that everything has a season, especially when it comes to me in comedy.  Nothing lasts forever.

The radio show is officially kaputskie.  No more sleepless nights, no more worrying about my safety having to walk home at 3:00 a.m. after the show, no more stress of having to find guests at the last minute, no more spending 6 to 8 hours of my own time each week to keep the show going, trying to find guests.  After almost 80 shows and 1.5 years on the air, it’s done…..at least on the radio.

I did not see this coming at all, but in hindsight it’s for the best, especially where my physical and mental health are concerned.  This will now free up my time to pursue other interests of mine as I work towards getting myself in a better situation career-wise.

It does suck in a way because I had so many new avenues to explore for guests, including the fifth Canadian headliner to come on the show.  I was excited to seek out new guests not only because I would be back on the radio, but because sometimes that’s the only chance I get to smile during the week.  You can hear my smile on the radio, I believe.  Also, the more comics I talk to, the more I get to learn from them.  Every comedian I have talked to I’ve come away learning something about comedy, or life that I can apply to my own.

I mentioned on the local comedy facebook group that the show was done.  I only got one comment from a local comic, and one from a guy that goes to my church.  two comments.  That’s it, despite all the money I spent to make the show work, the connections that took months to come through, the money I saved them working bingos, bringing an international audience to the radio station.  After busting my ass more than anyone, and getting very little in return, I was exhausted.  I needed a break, so I removed myself from the facebook comedy groups that I am a part of.

Look, I’ve studied comedy more than anyone around here and I can tell you that comics have this incessant need to be liked, for approval.  Otherwise, what’s the point of all that work if you don’t seek that payoff?  When you don’t get the recognition or credit, it does sting.  I didn’t get into this life of comedy to be ignored and disrespected, but for the most part that’s exactly what has happened.  I will go so far as to say that within the local comedy community, the only time they comment on something en masse is when I make a mistake.  It’s easy for people to be supportive when the show was on, but now that it is off the air, I don’t get that same level of support, at least from the local comics.  Maybe it’s time I realized that’s the way it will always be.

It’s like that in comedy everywhere.  You have other comics as friends until you make it big, leaving them behind.  We’re all guilty of that, including myself.  As a result, I deleted about half of my social media accounts related to comedy.  Maybe in that sense, less is more.

I do have plans to head back to Los Angeles next summer, so at least I have that to work towards and look forward to.  It’s just another example of me thinking outside of the box, creating new relationships and seeking out new opportunities, all with very little fanfare.

If less is supposed to be more, how come I’ve already written over 1,000 words for this post?  I need to quit while I’m ahead.