Making Sense of A Rambler

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Eddie Hearn, the head of Matchroom Boxing and one of the leading boxing promoters in the world, said recently that as you get older, you care less and less about what others think.  When you have accomplished some things and can leave a legacy of sorts, you don’t worry about who you piss off or annoy, because you have nothing to lose.  You state your opinions because you want to make a difference still, because there is a passion that still resonates within you.  I reckon to believe that’s true in my case.

The blog site just surpassed 50,000 views in over 110 countries.  We are closing in on 400 posts, which will probably happen sometime mid-2022.  I used to write these hoping to get a reaction, but now I don’t give a shit.  The other comics might sit back and wonder what goes on inside my head when they see me at a show.  That’s nice, because I wonder about them too.  That shit used to keep me up at night.  Now, I think about them in a brief moment when I am taking a dump, because in the end, that’s all it’s worth.

Hey, I went to changing jobs from making minimum wage to now making $3,800 a month for starters. So go eat shit.

Some may think my opinions are a complete fabrication of the facts, or blown out of proportion.  Again, I say go eat shit.  I’ve had ten years of this and I can read people, somewhat.

Yes, I am reworking my material for the second appearance to record for this local comedy contest.  But I do not believe I will win, let alone come close.  The newbies are pretty good.  They started becoming nervous and shy, with material that never got to the point with some four letter words thrown in, much like this blog post.  Nowadays, those newbies are smiling, full of confidence with clear and concise premises that elicit laughter from a well crafted punchline.

The newbies are getting opportunity that I never received.  I’m not bitching about it, that’s just a fact.  It’s good for them, because the new comics are becoming better at a far quicker pace than when I first started many, many, many moons ago.  When I first started out, new people trying comedy was rare.  What was even rarer were women trying comedy, or just any new comic coming out more than twice.  Now of course, the local comedy scene is taking off with growth and leadership that has never before been seen.  It is nice to see, but at the same time a bit of apathy has set in for me.

With the direction the world is heading in today, you’d think clean comedy would be ruling the roost.  But that’s not the case.  Your comedy doesn’t have to be clean, it just can’t be offensive.  That makes sense.  But my material was never the type to make you fall off your chair and piss yourself laughing on the floor.  I’m not sure any comic around here is known for that, especially not me.  Like I have said, I’ve been doing this ten years and I know the type of laughter I should get if I’m doing my job properly.  It’s an uncomfortable type of laugh for my friends to hear if they are at a show.  Wait, how would I know that?  Most of my friends don’t come to watch anymore.  Actually, I can’t remember the last time they did.

The type of laughs I get are not conducive to me winning a contest where my video gets sent to a panel of judges that aren’t connected to the local comedy scene.  For me to get those kind of laughs, the ones that would make judges notice, I have to hammer on the surprise and misdirection elements with each and every single joke I deliver.  Maybe that’s not entirely true?  I mean, you see acts at comedy festivals on t.v. and sometimes the performers get laughter that isn’t consistent among the acts.  There are reasons for that, as one comic is different from the next.  So maybe I am being a bit too hard on myself.  Every comedy lineup needs different acts.  You don’t need to be fall off the chair funny, you just need to be funny.  That’s what counts in the end, because what one person finds sorta funny, another person can find you to be freaking hilarious, not that I’ve encountered anybody thinking I’m hilarious, unless you are talking about other comics who listen to my material and die laughing because it’s more close to the truth than people realize.

Maybe I do have a chance after all then?  They say writing is therapeutic. Maybe in the process of writing out my thoughts that borderline on apathy, I have realized it all isn’t doom and gloom.  I’ve done this a long time and it’s cost me a lot, and gave me room to grow as a comic and as a person.  Staying true to who I am, I have carved out my own path that nobody else has forged before me, or followed me ever since.  I have done things that are thinking outside the box, taking bold, daring chances, realizing I may fail.

uh-oh.  There is that “f” word again.

As in comedy, business or life, you don’t grow unless you learn.  You cannot learn unless you have setbacks.  Setbacks do not define you, but they are part of your story.  You need to have an endurance and resiliency within you to be able to withstand the nights when things don’t work out.  I’m one of the rare exceptions that will readily admit when I am wrong, admit when things don’t work or when I have failed.  Sure, I have failed but at least I’ve evolved.  Anyone who watches my videos over the years can see that.  My material evolves because my life has evolved.  In the end, you can’t say that about a lot of people.

Now, if you will excuse me, I need to envision the colour of the new suit I will be wearing for my next appearance for the comedy contest, which will be…….

stay tuned

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